Thursday, August 2, 2007


When I waiting at one of 3 doctor's appointments this week ( and I've done a lot of waiting) I read an article entitled this. I thought I have this -- I have momfidence! For about the last year and half I have totally felt different about myself and my life. Now I don't know if it's having kids that did it or my age or just that I have accepted things about myself and am happy ~ it's probably a combo of it all. I remember in college I had a French teacher who talked about this sort of thing one day (I have no idea why) and she asked the class at what age they thought they would really feel like they have really have it all together? Some of the class answered 21 or 25 which I thought was funny cause I was almost 24 then (yeah it took me a while to get through college but I worked the whole time I went). The teacher said she thought it was 35 when it felt like you had it all together . . . her reasons were much different than mine (career was going, kids were older, she had been married/divorced) but I think she was definitely right about the age at least in my case. I just feel like I have it altogether in an unorganized sort of way. Now a lot of people would disagree with that statement: my house is far from spotless, I don't dress the part or do my hair/makeup very much, sometimes we can barely pay our bills, the kids can be wild, I forget stuff, my husband and I fight like crazy {Aaron and I are pretty much the "Barones" from Everybody loves Raymond doesn't matter which couple, we are all of them}. . . but you know I'm happy. I know what's important in life. I don't worry about things like money, how I look, or a picture perfect house -- those things aren't important at all no matter how you look at it. Sure it would be great if we had more money, I looked like a model, or my house was magically clean but really in the whole scheme of things it's so unimportant. All I really care about is that my family is happy and healthy. The time I spend with my husband and kids is really important. Liking myself is really important. Now I don't have all the answers to everything but I have stopped worrying about what others think about me and that is like a ton of bricks lifted off my shoulders. I am confident in my major decisions but I don't pretend to know all the answers (my Amazon order of 3 discipline books I placed yesterday proves that). I seem to attract a lot of people who feel necessary to give me advice on child raising (I guess I appear as though I need some with 3-1/2 kids). I find it funny that many people feel they are "experts" on raising kids. Most people don't really get that what works with one child many times doesn't really apply when you have multiples. The logistics just don't work out the same way and, believe me, I've tried. I really don't care what others think of me because they aren't living my life. So here I come with less than styled hair, no make-up, stained t-shirt, 3 screaming wild 2 year olds in tow, and looking really pregnant (enough that most people look shocked when I say I'm due in December). I'm sure they are thinking I'm glad I'm not her and I feel the same way; I want to be me and not have to try really hard to do that; you shouldn't have to. My life is real and I don't try to pretend otherwise and I do have "MOMFIDENCE".

Thanks, Grammy, for the cute boots. (I guess the kids discovered these accidentally the other day and had to have them). The kids love them and have been wearing them around the house the last few days. We are just waiting for rain so we can play in the mud!!!

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